Q: Now that you’re in your third house, I’m sure there are things you’ve learned about budgeting, decorating, house hunting, etc. having been through the process a few times now. Would you ever consider writing a post about what your first and second house taught you? -Alison
A: Absolutely — here’s a roundup of lessons we learned from our first two homes and how they’re shaping life and plans in our third. Experience counts. Each house taught us different things about priorities, spending, layout, and patience, and those lessons have influenced what we choose to save on, splurge on, and change. Below is a selection of insights, presented in a clear, practical way for anyone thinking about buying, renovating, or just living with what you have.
We want to splurge less than we did in the first house, but more than the second. Looking back, we probably overspent on finishes in our first home and were too frugal in our second. For context: our improvements and renovations were very different in scale and budget between the two homes. In the first house we invested in higher-end materials and hired pros for major work; the result was beautiful, but maybe more than that small house needed. In the second house we tightened the budget and did much of the work ourselves, which kept costs low and taught us valuable DIY skills—but we sometimes wished we’d spent a bit more on long-lasting, functional upgrades (for example, new cabinetry versus paint). For our third house we plan a hybrid approach: save on labor where it makes sense, but invest more in durable, high-quality finishes since we intend to stay long term.
We wanted to bring some of the cozy back. We moved from our first to our second house for more space — bigger rooms, more bathrooms, and room to grow. But after living in a much larger space for a while we missed the compact, intimate feel of our first living room. That prompted us to prioritize a cozy, well-proportioned living area in this house. The result feels like a balance: enough room to live comfortably without losing the warmth and intimacy that make a space feel like home.
We want openness too, but where it counts. Openness matters: it helps light travel through a home and creates an easy flow for everyday life. From widening doorways to removing interior walls, we’ve learned to embrace connected spaces. One consistent goal across all three homes has been better sightlines and better social flow between kitchen and living areas. Structural limitations stopped us before, but this time we’re resolving smaller obstacles—like removing a wet bar or relocating plumbing—so the kitchen and living room can finally function as a single, welcoming hub.
We made floors a top priority. Floors change the feel of a home more than almost anything else. In our first house we redid every floor and it transformed the space. We didn’t manage to do that in our second house and we regretted it. That taught us to tackle flooring early: it’s disruptive, but doing it right is worth the inconvenience. In this house we prioritized refinishing and replacing hardwoods right away so the rest of our decorating could land on a cohesive foundation.
We wanted to get outside easily. Easy outdoor access is more important than we expected. When a yard or deck is cumbersome to reach, outdoor living happens less often. Having an accessible deck or patio level with the main living areas makes outdoor cooking, play, and relaxing feel natural. We deliberately chose a house where the deck feels like an extension of the living space and are planning to make that connection even easier by converting a large bay of windows into doors.
Patience is paramount. Early on we expected transformations to happen quickly. In reality, meaningful changes often take years. That slow evolution can be frustrating at first, but we now appreciate the process. Allowing a home to come together over time means choices are more thoughtful and personal touches feel more rewarding. We’ve learned to enjoy incremental progress: plan carefully, save for the right things, and do the work well rather than rush to finish.
There are more small lessons—about lighting, storage, and how a family actually uses rooms—but the ideas above are the biggest influences on how we approach this house. Between budgets that reflect both experience and restraint, a focus on practical comfort, and a willingness to let a home evolve gradually, we feel more confident about making choices we’ll be happy with for years to come.
How about you? What have past living situations taught you—whether that’s renting, living with roommates, or growing up at home—that shapes what you’re looking for now or in a future home?
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As a little Friday bonus, here are a few active topics from our community forums and a handful of recent conversations to check out if you’re curious.
| Penny-Pinching Porch Makeover | Movie and TV Show Homes You Love | Colored Pencil Organizer from Scrap Wood | How to Find a Good Realtor | |||
| by PrettyOrganized | by curvyfurniture | by crabandfishblog | by karazzies |
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